Thirsty

Friday, December 10, 2004

The Wall

I just had an interesting - yet drunk - conversation with a buddy from Finland. It probably was more of a monologue, but it made me realize something very significant about myself.

I believe everyone, every single human being on this planet has a wall, to protect what's inside the fortress. It is the pure essence, afraid, full of doubts and hidden from the ones that pass by.

Most people have a few people they can at least open that wall to, talk about their emotions and maybe even be able to cry when that person is around. I, on the other hand, can talk to anybody about what's happening behind the fortress walls. I rationalize, conceive it using language and communicate. Like a newspaper from the USSR, it jumps over the Berlin Wall and enters the so-called free world. I must be the biggest publishing company, because I communicate a lot, to anybody. No boundaries there.

However, rather than the rationalised jumping over the wall, actually emotionally breaking that wall in order for someone from the outside to enter inside the fortress and see that glowing part...I just can't. It's not that I don't want to, though. It just goes beyond all my powers.

I hide myself underneath the letters of my newspaper, as dry as possible, so that coincidental tears would not blur the message.

A perfect cold war is being fought between the outside and the inner side. Maybe it's time for a Cultural Revolution, time to burn all books, all written resources, in order to break that Wall.

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